my favourite things/ a pancake birthday

she got to choose
any meal
a home cooked meal
whatever she wanted

a birthday girl
Sihle
six years old
Oh Treasure

she went to bed so excited
and I am sure her dreams were filled
with tables of all her favourite foods
I am certain her dreams were filled
with squeals of pure delight
clapped hands
birthday singing
cake
and
ice cream


candles
six of them

this little girl
is a dancer
she runs
and climbs rock walls
she falls and says she is fine
she draws and paints
tells wonderful stories
and
she loves a party

pancakes
"Mom, I want pancakes... O joy... pancakes please"

of all meals
it will be pancakes
and peanut butter
syrup from Canada for some others
jam for some
whipping cream and strawberries for mom

there is an excitement about pancakes
which makes everyone happy

Sihle loves laughter
her birthday will be filled with it
inside and out
wrapped in pretty paper
and with every card
laughter will roll around the room
leak out of every seam
and fill her little girl heart

this Gramma will sneak a Skype peak
will sing her birthday song

will hear 'her' story
and see all the smiles

Nomusa said it was a surprise
her present and Mario's

Sihle
this little treasure
worth everything to the Father

God set a big love into a woman's ordinary heart
it leaked out and touched a little baby
she knew she could not live without this little one
and another one
and another
and one more

she told me she has cared for hundreds of infants
and loved them all
but something tangled in her heart of hearts
that wouldn't let go of a certain four

They will all get a birthday meal one day
and one day Lord willing
it will be at Gramma's
so I can catch all these leaky giggles
that wrap these kids up in so much love
in a forever family

Sihle was much younger
when she said her daddy was God
and they all said their heart mommy was my Shoshi

just last week they said
in Canada
in our new home Uncle is building for us
Grampa and Gramma
and all our friends
are building for us
~it will be the house Love built~
can we walk to Gramma's?
can Gramma come to our house for a sleep over?

I will make them pancakes
and see all their leaky giggles
and feel all their leaky love

a pancake birthday

my favourite things

my favourite things/ this little person

his photo
sits on my desktop

something deep within me understands
what every grandmother knows

he is perfect
just as is
and loved
completely cherished
and somehow
this smile never really leaves my face

when I need some encouragement
I just sit and look again
and this heart swells up full
and nothing else quite matters

he is perfect
just as is

and this grandmother's love
will only grow more fond
as she watches
breadth of days added
and smiles scattered
and giggles filling the hours
and discoverings
and fun
some tears
and all that love wrapped up
in mama papa hugs
and somewhere
a special spot

for a gramma
who will always love
this little person

just as is

my favourite things

my favourite things/ storms

it was outrageous
how the sky fell
nothing could hold on to the leaves

not even tent caterpillars

a curtain of wetness
cast furioiusly across the farm
the sound deafening
a half hour strong
leaving puddles
and new rivlets
and a cleansing
in its wake

then the calm

a lovely thing
to see the fluorescent greens
the leaves dancing and joyous again
and somehow the thought of them
delivered
from the
devouring

this set my heart to dancing

I had taken photos today
before the storm
in case all the leaves vanished by tomorrow
and things might became as a barren winter
once more

but now the storm
has come
thunderous

and left the leaves
redeemed

the birds were still singing
My heart was singing
with them

storms
my favourite things

my favourite things/ first flights

 

[ First ever flight of two common goldeneye ducks.  Check out other amazing photos by :
http://naturen-ar-fantastisk.blogspot.ca/p/insekternas-fantastiska-varld.html ]

I have often wondered
how the ducklings got to the ground
safely

each year in the big lightning struck Cottonwood
down in Pete and Marie's hay field
a mama duck plants a nest
as high up as high can go

the hole in the tree 
is generous
the grass around 
soft enough
and each year I just shake my head
and marvel
at the pair's return
and persistent building
in such a high rise

I have never been there to see them come out
...the ducklings...
to see them fall
like baby robins
who topple out of their nests
and usually land harmlessly
my hope was always that they would land harmlessly
each year I would breathe a little prayer

I mean
have you ever seen their fat little bodies and their miniature wings?

I shake my head as I walk away each year
and marvel

and now this  photo

35 years I have marvelled
but never seen

35 years I have looked at the lightning struck tree
and wondered if a family would return

and when they do
I simply marvel

no less today

I mean
just look at the delight 
in those little ducklings
and their first flight

it is the same joy
I saw in Jedaiah's eyes after Bethany had led him
up to the high tower at Simon Fraser Pool
and he had jumped
taken first flight 
(he wasn't yet two)
(his joy was like these ducklings)
over and over again
he would jump
for the pure joy 
of falling

now he sky dives

these ducklings will take their
thousand mile migration
come fall
and I am sure what brings them back each Spring
will be the memory
of

their first flight
 
I still marvel
but now I smile...

first flights
my favouite things

my favourite things/joy cometh in the morning

we need joy
around this world
it seems

so much is falling apart
cities and roads crushed and sinking
fires burning
waters rising
children hungry
lives shattered and taken
and others tarnished by sin's ravages
the pain inflicted so deep
------------------
I'm off to milk
I'm off to sit bent low on bended knee
my head sunk in 12 goat flanks
steamy milk rising to meet these tears
long stained for all who weep
their loved ones hurt or lost
some confused and crushed
by death
or sin's dark stain
the night so dark
it chokes
and fear takes
hope
away
-----------------
Weeping may last through the night
but joy cometh in the morning

our wedding verse
presented to us by an uninvited couple
who wanted to come and bless us anyways

did they have any idea this verse would guard our hearts
and help us press on 36 years now

I keep trying to understand its power
all I know is that
in the morning
something is always new
and though the pain is still there
hope has made it through
~fear has fled
night has passed
and with the day
our hope's
renewed

-------------
I'm off to milk
and weep
and pray
that joy
may come
with
break
of
day
----------------
when
joy cometh in the morning
it is one of
my favourite things

my favourite things/ this growing old together

I love that it comes every year
the reminder of a promise
a love vow kept

I love our grey hair
the wrinkle lines
the eyes fading
the strength waning

we were young then
hadn't proven love
folks just watched and waited
we lived

and now that love is tested
we laugh more
we know it doesn't have to ever really break
completely
the soft heart keeps it alive

God
keeps the heart soft

this is what I have learned
that I may choose life
but it is God who gives strength of days
I may choose love
but it is God who gives understanding
I may choose to be faithful
but it is God who sends away the darkness
so that in the light we may grow old
together
in Him we grow gloriously wrinkled
and aged together
I have learned that though the body age
the spirit stays eternally young
and we can learn not to be afraid
of being set free

I have learned that time shared
is proof that love does everything it was ever meant to do
that love is everything it was ever meant to be
that love heals broken moments
that love lifts shared prayers
that love binds longing hearts
that love frees soaring spirits

that growing old 'together'
is a 'love' gift
from a very Old Father
who before time ever was
planned that we His children
should share eternity with Him
and it is here
in this holy union
that we learn the joy
of all heaven could ever hold

He gives us so much

it has really only just begun

this growing old together
we will laugh through all eternity
together
we learn how here
now

this growing old together

my favourite things

my favourite things/ double rainbows and the pot of gold

I came out of the barn
wiped my sweaty brow
took up my two full buckets of milk
and looked up from my scuffed shoes to the path home
it was still breathtaking

When I had come out to milk the goats
they were all still roaming in the new pasture
fresh green grass like soft velvet
beneath their hooves
the sound of their munch munching
had stopped me
I had laid down my buckets
decidedly sat there against the barn
and watched

twenty goats encased in a double rainbow
stretched from NorthEast to NorthWest
the mist still drizzling over them
100 meters away I stood in dryness
the sky above me blue and rich with dotted cotton
the sun parading down against the horizon behind me
the glow golden and warm against my beastlies
the sky above them soft gray
the rainbows' glowing against this soft paynes gray
the new leaves of the poplars
very much alive
vibrant on the darkened backdrop

I could almost see the Master painting
I stood in silent awe

I just watched
then closed my eyes and just listened
then shut out everything and just felt the mist begin to sway my way
I remember the first day I smelled Spring
the day Winter just slipped away
the one snow pile on the northside of the barn
the only reminder of the very long rest
the dogs seeking it out for refreshment
a reminder that I was not the only one sad to see its beauty slip away

but now

now I am breathless
the rainbow is iridescent
this indigo starting and coming up again then again
I memorize the colours
I try to remember how kids paint its memory
blue into green
yellow into orange
red into royalty once more
then it is repeated above itself
softer
muted
arching God's promise above the land
of the living
God is with us

and for today
no battle here
though in the distance
I hear the thunder
today all is peace here
joy fills my heart
contentment

this moment is enough

I lift my face from my scuffed shoes
I can still see
double rainbows
and the pot
of gold

my favourite things